Ибн аль-Му'тазз
понедельник, 18 марта 2013 г.
вторник, 5 марта 2013 г.
The Husband
Mother and daughter.
Girl. Mother, I wish you would fetch me a Husband. I want one dreadfully.
Mother. Why do you wish to have a Husband? What would you do with one?
G. I want one to play with.
M. But a Husband cannot play with you. I should think you would prefer a kitten, for that can understand your play and play back again.
G. Yes, mother, and it can scratch and bite too. Now a Husband never scratches nor bites, and I like a Husband best.
M. You can teach a kitten not to scratch or bite, but you can't teach a Husband anything.
G. Can't I teach him to sit up, or to hold his tongue?
M. No, he will do that without teaching. I will fetch you a Husband, if you will tell me how he will be of any use to you.
G. He will make me love you better, dear mother.
M If I give you an orange, will not that do the same?
G. Why, mother, how you bother me. I want a Husband to look at, to hug, and to kiss, as if it was a little baby, but I do not hug and kiss an orange.
M. Do you think you could love a little Husband?
G. O yes, I am sure I could, if it was pretty.
M. Does my loving you depend upon your being pretty? I think it depends more upon your being good.
G. Well, mother, the Husband is always good as can be, but I am sometimes naughty.
M. The Husband is good because he can't be otherwise, and there is no merit in such goodness. To be really good, you must not only not do wrong, but you must do something right. Let me explain what I have said. I will fetch you a Husband if you insist upon it, but my opinion is, that you will like him much better, and he will do you much more good if you make it yourself.
G. I don't know how, mother.
M. I will show you.
G. Then I shall be glad to make him myself.
M. Though you may not make him so well as I could, at first, still he will be your own, and, you know, mothers love their own children better than other people's. (Kissing her.)
G. But, mother, why did you wish me to have a kitten instead of a Husband?
M. Because, in teaching such a young animal, you would learn much yourself that you couldn't learn from a Husband.
G. What would the kitten teach me, reading or spelling, writing or needlework?
M. She would teach you kindness. She would teach yon patience, if you had to bear with her ignorance ; forbearance, if you were tried by her ill temper ; forgiveness, if she offended you. There is hardly a virtue that would not be improved, if you treated her properly.
G. Why may I not have both a kitten and a Husband, then ?
M. You shall do so; and now I will go and find something to make the Husband of, while you go and get your work-box, for the best time to do work is while you are in the mood for it.
Girl. Mother, I wish you would fetch me a Husband. I want one dreadfully.
Mother. Why do you wish to have a Husband? What would you do with one?
G. I want one to play with.
M. But a Husband cannot play with you. I should think you would prefer a kitten, for that can understand your play and play back again.
G. Yes, mother, and it can scratch and bite too. Now a Husband never scratches nor bites, and I like a Husband best.
M. You can teach a kitten not to scratch or bite, but you can't teach a Husband anything.
G. Can't I teach him to sit up, or to hold his tongue?
M. No, he will do that without teaching. I will fetch you a Husband, if you will tell me how he will be of any use to you.
G. He will make me love you better, dear mother.
M If I give you an orange, will not that do the same?
G. Why, mother, how you bother me. I want a Husband to look at, to hug, and to kiss, as if it was a little baby, but I do not hug and kiss an orange.
M. Do you think you could love a little Husband?
G. O yes, I am sure I could, if it was pretty.
M. Does my loving you depend upon your being pretty? I think it depends more upon your being good.
G. Well, mother, the Husband is always good as can be, but I am sometimes naughty.
M. The Husband is good because he can't be otherwise, and there is no merit in such goodness. To be really good, you must not only not do wrong, but you must do something right. Let me explain what I have said. I will fetch you a Husband if you insist upon it, but my opinion is, that you will like him much better, and he will do you much more good if you make it yourself.
G. I don't know how, mother.
M. I will show you.
G. Then I shall be glad to make him myself.
M. Though you may not make him so well as I could, at first, still he will be your own, and, you know, mothers love their own children better than other people's. (Kissing her.)
G. But, mother, why did you wish me to have a kitten instead of a Husband?
M. Because, in teaching such a young animal, you would learn much yourself that you couldn't learn from a Husband.
G. What would the kitten teach me, reading or spelling, writing or needlework?
M. She would teach you kindness. She would teach yon patience, if you had to bear with her ignorance ; forbearance, if you were tried by her ill temper ; forgiveness, if she offended you. There is hardly a virtue that would not be improved, if you treated her properly.
G. Why may I not have both a kitten and a Husband, then ?
M. You shall do so; and now I will go and find something to make the Husband of, while you go and get your work-box, for the best time to do work is while you are in the mood for it.
воскресенье, 24 февраля 2013 г.
Похвала медику
Похвала медику
Кто этот храбрый молодец,
Что рад тебе помочь,
Когда грозит тебе 3,14здец
И жить уже невмочь?
Когда крадётся к нам недуг
Как подколодный змей,
Кто самый лучший тебе друг
Из всей толпы людей?
То врач отважный, он спешит
Всегда на помощь нам,
Ни днём, ни ночью он не спит.
Я честь ему воздам!
Кто этот храбрый молодец,
Что рад тебе помочь,
Когда грозит тебе 3,14здец
И жить уже невмочь?
Когда крадётся к нам недуг
Как подколодный змей,
Кто самый лучший тебе друг
Из всей толпы людей?
То врач отважный, он спешит
Всегда на помощь нам,
Ни днём, ни ночью он не спит.
Я честь ему воздам!
суббота, 23 февраля 2013 г.
Voyage dans l'Indostan, par M. Perrin
Les nations Indiennes sont tout-à-fait
ressemblantes aux Français pour les traits du visage, le maintien, le geste et
la démarche. On ne fait point un pas sans s’y méprendre, sans croire distinguer
dans la foule , des amis qu'on a laissés en France. Plus on examine, plus on
est séduit : aussi, si l’on me demandoit une définition propre et caractéristique
d’un Indien, je dirois c’est l’homme du globe qui ressemble plus aux Français, à la
couleur près.
вторник, 19 февраля 2013 г.
Глупый сын визиря
نقل ١
ايك وزيركا بيٹا نادان و كند ذهن تہا وزيرنے ايك دانا كي پاس اسے بہيجا اور
كہا كہ اس لڑكي كو تربات كر شايد كہ
عقلمند هو جاوے چنانچه دانانے اس كي تعليم مين بہت سے كوشش كي پر كچہ فايده
نہوا پس لاچار هوكر لڑكي كو اس كي باپ كي پاس پہير بہيجا اور كہا كہ تيرا بيٹا
عاقل نہين حوا اور مجہے ديوانہ كيا
У одного визиря был глупый и
необразованный сын. Визирь послал его к мудрецу и сказал: «Возможно, после
обучения этот парень станет умным». Поэтому мудрец приложил немало усилий для
обучения этого юноши, но никаких успехов не достиг. Осознав свою беспомощность,
он отослал юношу назад к отцу и сказал ему: «Ваш сын так и остался глупым, а
меня довёл до безумия».
четверг, 14 февраля 2013 г.
Мой принцип: никогда ни о чём не сожалеть
Мой принцип: никогда ни о чём не сожалеть
Интервью Данилова газете «Студенческая летопись». Часть вторая.
Скажите, как вам пришла в голову мысль создать конвейер по изготовлению кандидатов и докторов исторических наук?
Ещё с детства меня мучила мысль о несовершенстве этого мира. Почему у одних есть учёная степень, а у других нет? Эту несправедливость надо устранить, подумалось мне. И вот я с проверенными товарищами организовал кооператив по остепенению любого желающего. За сравнительно небольшие деньги можно получить степень, после чего в визитке вместо «техник-смотритель» смело писать «кандидат (или доктор) исторических наук».
Какие у вас дальнейшие планы?
Мы хотели бы расширить нашу деятельность и охватить ещё больший круг населения. Как известно, при проклятой советской власти были планы по всеобщему среднему образованию. В наши дни высшее образование становится практически обязательным. Но это не предел! Мои друзья и я хотели бы добиться такого положения, при котором даже дворник мог бы стать кандидатом. Всё, что для этого нужно, это деньги. Плати и получай корочку.
Как события последних двух месяцев повлияли на деятельность вашей фирмы?
Самым лучшим образом. Смотрите сами: если ещё в прошлом ноябре наши услуги обходились для соискателя в пределах одного лимона, то теперь, благодаря трудам пресловутой комиссии, они стоят от двух лимонов и выше. Таким образом, все наши сотрудники станут зарабатывать ещё больше.
Разрешите нескромный вопрос. А какую долю из этой суммы получаете вы лично?
Я не хотел бы называть конкретные суммы, чтобы не возбуждать зависти у читателей вашей газеты. Могу только сказать, что на хлеб с маслом и икоркой мне хватает.
Что бы вы могли пожелать студентам, ещё только вступающим в трудовую жизнь?
Дерзайте, юноши и девушки, и ваши труды на ниве остепенения граждан будут вознаграждены. Но не попадайтесь.
Интервью Данилова газете «Студенческая летопись». Часть вторая.
Скажите, как вам пришла в голову мысль создать конвейер по изготовлению кандидатов и докторов исторических наук?
Ещё с детства меня мучила мысль о несовершенстве этого мира. Почему у одних есть учёная степень, а у других нет? Эту несправедливость надо устранить, подумалось мне. И вот я с проверенными товарищами организовал кооператив по остепенению любого желающего. За сравнительно небольшие деньги можно получить степень, после чего в визитке вместо «техник-смотритель» смело писать «кандидат (или доктор) исторических наук».
Какие у вас дальнейшие планы?
Мы хотели бы расширить нашу деятельность и охватить ещё больший круг населения. Как известно, при проклятой советской власти были планы по всеобщему среднему образованию. В наши дни высшее образование становится практически обязательным. Но это не предел! Мои друзья и я хотели бы добиться такого положения, при котором даже дворник мог бы стать кандидатом. Всё, что для этого нужно, это деньги. Плати и получай корочку.
Как события последних двух месяцев повлияли на деятельность вашей фирмы?
Самым лучшим образом. Смотрите сами: если ещё в прошлом ноябре наши услуги обходились для соискателя в пределах одного лимона, то теперь, благодаря трудам пресловутой комиссии, они стоят от двух лимонов и выше. Таким образом, все наши сотрудники станут зарабатывать ещё больше.
Разрешите нескромный вопрос. А какую долю из этой суммы получаете вы лично?
Я не хотел бы называть конкретные суммы, чтобы не возбуждать зависти у читателей вашей газеты. Могу только сказать, что на хлеб с маслом и икоркой мне хватает.
Что бы вы могли пожелать студентам, ещё только вступающим в трудовую жизнь?
Дерзайте, юноши и девушки, и ваши труды на ниве остепенения граждан будут вознаграждены. Но не попадайтесь.
понедельник, 11 февраля 2013 г.
The aliens and the humans.
Little alien Ellen and her mother.
Ellen. Mother, what are these little mites of humans made for? They are too small to be eaten, and not large enough to work.
Mother. They may as well ask what you are good for, Ellen, for you are small, and not fit to be eaten, and, as they earn their living, they must work harder than you do.
E. Yes, but you know what I mean, mother. I shall grow up one of these days, but they will never be larger than my fist.
M. I hope you will live to grow up, though this is by no means certain. But I do not wish to evade your question. Though the little humans may be of no use to us, we may conclude that they are not useless, for the Creator has a design in every thing he makes. If the humans are too small to serve as food for an alien, they are large enough to feed many creatures smaller than aliens.
E. Then other creatures eat humans, mother? O yes, I might know they do, for I saw my favorite goblin eating a little human that he or her mother had caught.
M. Do not the little humans seem to be happy?
E. O yes, mother. I never saw such happy little things; they are chirping, or flying, or playing, all the time.
M. Then, perhaps, they were made to be happy. Do you like to see the little things?
E. O yes, mother, I dearly like to see them.
M. Then, perhaps, they were also made to contribute to your happiness. Did I see you giving them some crumbs of bread just now?
E. Yes, mother, the snow covers the ground, and I feared the little things would starve for want of food.
M. And you helped them out of pity, did you?
E. Yes, I did, mother. Was it wrong to do so?
M. O no, my dear child, and I presume it was one of the most important uses of their creation to give us an opportunity to cultivate our benevolent affections. You would not hurt the little creatures, would you, Ellen?
E. O, no, mother, I would do any thing to help them.
M. There is nothing greater than charity, and any creature, however small, that moves us to kindness, affection, benevolence, or love, which are only other names for charity, is created for a noble purpose, and the little humans have not been made in vain, if they have excited tender feelings in my little daughter's bosom.
E. (To the humans) O you dear little humans, how could I think you were good for nothing because you were not fit to eat ? I’ll go and get some more bread for you this minute, and, if you would like to live with me this winter, I'll board you for nothing, and do your washing gratis just as I do my little goblin's.
Ellen. Mother, what are these little mites of humans made for? They are too small to be eaten, and not large enough to work.
Mother. They may as well ask what you are good for, Ellen, for you are small, and not fit to be eaten, and, as they earn their living, they must work harder than you do.
E. Yes, but you know what I mean, mother. I shall grow up one of these days, but they will never be larger than my fist.
M. I hope you will live to grow up, though this is by no means certain. But I do not wish to evade your question. Though the little humans may be of no use to us, we may conclude that they are not useless, for the Creator has a design in every thing he makes. If the humans are too small to serve as food for an alien, they are large enough to feed many creatures smaller than aliens.
E. Then other creatures eat humans, mother? O yes, I might know they do, for I saw my favorite goblin eating a little human that he or her mother had caught.
M. Do not the little humans seem to be happy?
E. O yes, mother. I never saw such happy little things; they are chirping, or flying, or playing, all the time.
M. Then, perhaps, they were made to be happy. Do you like to see the little things?
E. O yes, mother, I dearly like to see them.
M. Then, perhaps, they were also made to contribute to your happiness. Did I see you giving them some crumbs of bread just now?
E. Yes, mother, the snow covers the ground, and I feared the little things would starve for want of food.
M. And you helped them out of pity, did you?
E. Yes, I did, mother. Was it wrong to do so?
M. O no, my dear child, and I presume it was one of the most important uses of their creation to give us an opportunity to cultivate our benevolent affections. You would not hurt the little creatures, would you, Ellen?
E. O, no, mother, I would do any thing to help them.
M. There is nothing greater than charity, and any creature, however small, that moves us to kindness, affection, benevolence, or love, which are only other names for charity, is created for a noble purpose, and the little humans have not been made in vain, if they have excited tender feelings in my little daughter's bosom.
E. (To the humans) O you dear little humans, how could I think you were good for nothing because you were not fit to eat ? I’ll go and get some more bread for you this minute, and, if you would like to live with me this winter, I'll board you for nothing, and do your washing gratis just as I do my little goblin's.
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